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*deep breath* *tears*
it's on its way friends... friday august 9th i'm going in for surgery.
i have hesitated for some time talking about it anymore b/c i was so unsure of what was in store, but now, with the call i got lastnight, i can see ahead... 7 weeks. terrified (to put it lightly) one minute and happy the next (just need it done with!)... a very mixed bag of emotions.
the notes:
-left amygdalo-hippocampectomy, taking most of the amyg and part of the hippo.
-after 17 days in the unit and team analysis the neurosurgeon informed me it was lesional epilepsy, due to cortical dysplasia, which means i've had the lesion/will-happen-one-day epilepsy since i was in my mother's womb (gasp, couldn't believe it). i didn't start having seizures until i was 15, was diagnosed at 25, and the lesion was only found in 2011. to learn it all started happening 34 years ago was unreal.
-of all four levels of outcome (1 being no seizures again, 4 being no change/worse), he is certain i am in the number 1 category, is very confident i will come out seizure-free. i know E is incurable and will just keep riding on the fact that he says i'm in the number 1.
-on the heels of that positivity he is also one of the top neurosurgeons in canada - right now this is my silver lining and i tell myself (lol and anyone who'll listen) that every day. he is also a vascular surgeon so if there's issues with blood clots, etc., he's the man. thank fucking god.
-incision starts by my left ear and goes up across the hairline behind my forehead.
-5 days in the hospital, first 2/3 being intensive care.
-slight chance it's a tumor but if so they're very sure it's benign.
-their only concern is about loss of verbal ability after (can't find words etc.). i HATE that thought as it will affect my ability to run my business, however, it's better than the worst.
-he, nor this hospital, have ever lost someone in brain surgery (i had to ask that, had to know, may have swayed my decision).
this has been one long ugly road, and there's no way in hell i could have got through it without you guys. cwe was one of the best things that ever happened to me. thank you for all your help, advice, listening to mine haha, and for just 'knowing' what this hell feels like. to nak for knowing everything! and helping with everything, and to my best E friends - neil, mel, andrew, and chris - you mean the world and will be in my thoughts as i head into that operating room. i love you guys.... and thanks again
it's on its way friends... friday august 9th i'm going in for surgery.
i have hesitated for some time talking about it anymore b/c i was so unsure of what was in store, but now, with the call i got lastnight, i can see ahead... 7 weeks. terrified (to put it lightly) one minute and happy the next (just need it done with!)... a very mixed bag of emotions.
the notes:
-left amygdalo-hippocampectomy, taking most of the amyg and part of the hippo.
-after 17 days in the unit and team analysis the neurosurgeon informed me it was lesional epilepsy, due to cortical dysplasia, which means i've had the lesion/will-happen-one-day epilepsy since i was in my mother's womb (gasp, couldn't believe it). i didn't start having seizures until i was 15, was diagnosed at 25, and the lesion was only found in 2011. to learn it all started happening 34 years ago was unreal.
-of all four levels of outcome (1 being no seizures again, 4 being no change/worse), he is certain i am in the number 1 category, is very confident i will come out seizure-free. i know E is incurable and will just keep riding on the fact that he says i'm in the number 1.
-on the heels of that positivity he is also one of the top neurosurgeons in canada - right now this is my silver lining and i tell myself (lol and anyone who'll listen) that every day. he is also a vascular surgeon so if there's issues with blood clots, etc., he's the man. thank fucking god.
-incision starts by my left ear and goes up across the hairline behind my forehead.
-5 days in the hospital, first 2/3 being intensive care.
-slight chance it's a tumor but if so they're very sure it's benign.
-their only concern is about loss of verbal ability after (can't find words etc.). i HATE that thought as it will affect my ability to run my business, however, it's better than the worst.
-he, nor this hospital, have ever lost someone in brain surgery (i had to ask that, had to know, may have swayed my decision).
this has been one long ugly road, and there's no way in hell i could have got through it without you guys. cwe was one of the best things that ever happened to me. thank you for all your help, advice, listening to mine haha, and for just 'knowing' what this hell feels like. to nak for knowing everything! and helping with everything, and to my best E friends - neil, mel, andrew, and chris - you mean the world and will be in my thoughts as i head into that operating room. i love you guys.... and thanks again
.
and yeah good to ask mel, she's a two-time surgery veteran and also a close friend so she'll likely be the first person i get in touch with. i'm having the same surgery as her also, just different sides, so her level of understanding is amazing.
op:
